My 20 Favorite Christmas Songs

I Love Christmas music, so much so I've decided to "Blog" about my 20 favorite Christmas Songs. That and I have nothing better to do, I guess I could clean but who wants to do that. This could be the companion piece for your Christmas party or a shuffle on your iPod while shopping to put you in the spirit! Enjoy!!!



Track 1: Jingle Bells -The Singing Dogs



This is my most favorite Christmas song of all time. I usually put it as my answering macihine right after Thanksgiving. Its the first Christmas song I listen to every year, and this year will be no diffrent, thats why it's first on my list.



Track 2: Santa Claus's Party- The Aquabats



It was only a matter of time that the world's raddest band made the world's raddest Christmas song. This song envokes visions of stop motion reindeer ice skating while the Bat Commander does backflips off of Christmas trees!



Track 3: I Dont Believe In Santa Claus-The Vandals



This is off of the Oi to The World Album by the Vandals. I love the fact that one of my favorite bands put out a Christmas album. It makes my parents mad when they tell me to put on a Christmas CD and this finds its way into the CD changer. It the perfect punk rock parody of Christmas time. It makes my soul make hot cocoa. :)





Track 4: Christmas Wrapping-The Waitresses



This song is pretty sweet and its very 80's! It has everything a good Christmas song should have: Trumpets, a catchy riff and a good story that plays out like a modern day Chistmas movie.



Track 5: Fuck Christmas- FEAR



This song is pretty short but it gets the point across. Why should the Vandals have the only awesome punk Christmas songs. Unlike the last song this song does not have a happy ending, instead it's full of dispair and ends with a steel toed kick to the balls.



Track 6: Im Dreaming of A Green Christmas- MC Lars



If you have not heard of MC Lars you should check him out he is one of the coolest Nerd core rappers around. Talking about the current "Green" fad and just how bad our enviroment is. Word.



Track 7: No Presents for Christmas- Exhumed



When I think of Christmas I think of Exhumed. This is a cover to a King Diamond song, but more importantly the guys who did Funeral Fuck did a Christmas song. I wish they would have grinded out a whole Christmas album before they broke up. As far as I know it's the only death metal Christmas song (thats not that lame metal Christmas cd I found on iTunes). If I were making an awesome death metal compilation cd it would have Impaled singing Silent Night and Brujeria singing Feliz Navid. ..m/



Track 8: The Chipmunk Song- Alvin and The Chipmunks



The Chipmunks have just as much to do with Christmas as Santa and presents do. Its like a law that this song was to be on my list. Just like Purple People Eater needs to be played on every Halloween, this need to be played every Christmas.



Track 9: Christmas Medley-Pokemon Cast



Did you know there was a Pokemon Christmas Album? I did and its awesome!!!



Track 10: The Night Santa Went Crazy- "Weird Al" Yankovic



This is my favorite Weird Al Christmas song. Except after 9/11 when I kept playing "Its Christmas at Ground Zero". There were two versions of this song recorded. The other one is called "the Extra Gory Version" Instead of Santa going to jail he gets killed.
"Yes, Virginia, now Santa Claus is dead
Some guy from the SWAT team blew a hole through his head
Yes, little friend, now that's his brains on the floor
Guess you won't have the fat guy to kick around anymore
Well now there's no more presents for the children's enjoyment
And the elves gotta stand in line to file for unemployment
And they say Mrs. Claus, she's on the phone every night
With her lawyer negotiating the movie rights"
Awesome!



Track 11: I Want a Hippopotamus For Christmas- Gayla Peevey



I love this song. I like Christmas songs sung by Children. Contrary to popular belief Shirley Temple did not sing this song. I like to Imagine it a munchkin from the Wizard of OZ singing this song. I could just march around my appartment in my underpants singing this song all day.



Track 12: Santa Claus is a Black Man- AKIM & The Teddy Vann Production Company



This kid singing has the best voice ever. The song it so funky it makes me want to wear bell bottoms and find my Black Panthers Afro Pic. I heard it on the John Waters Christmas album, which is one of the best Christmas compilations I have ever heard. Right now he is making a Christmas Movie called Fruitcake starring Johnny Knoxville. Hopefully the sounddtrack is just as good as this cd.



Track 13: Christmas Night Of Zombies-MXPX



I love Christmas. I love Zombies. This song has both ttherefore it gets the Zack Beins seal of aproval.



Track 14:Drinking Up Christmas- The Dwarves



The Dwarves are a fun band that has naked midgets on their album covers. This song is a send up of their song "There better be Women" off of their Dwarves come Clean Album. This song is available on Greedy Boot1 which can only be bought off of their web site..



Track 15: Christmas in Hollis- Run DMC



Run DMC is my favorite Hip Hop group of all time. This song was in Die Hard one of the most bad ass Christmas Movies of all time. They also did another Christmas song called "Christmas Is" but its just as good and fresh as this classic track. This song is just as traditional as stockings and egg nog. It should be the next Rockin around the Christmas Tree.



Track 16: Oi to the World-The Vandals



Again from my favorite christmas album. Its the original, "slightly harder" than that Holla back girls version Gwen Icantspellherlastnameii's version. Her version is just as bad as Paul McCartney's Christmastime Song. He at least appoligized for his song however. So in all of its orignal glory comes a tale of Haji and Trevor.



Track 17: What Can You Get a Wookie For Christmas (When He Already Owns a Comb?)-The Star Wars Christmas Album



Many people have heard of the Star Wars Christmas Special, but not too many people have heard of the Christmas in the Stars: Star Wars Christmas Album. Sadly I only have this on vinal and I need it on cd. I need it like a junky needs his fix. The album is hosted and mostly sung by R2-D2 and C-3P0. Its quite possibaly the worst/lamest Christmas album ever.



Track 18: Oh Come All Ye Faithful- Twisted Sister



This song was on Twisted Sister's last album, A Twisted Christmas. Dee Snyder, lead singer said it was going to be Twisted Sisters last album ever. So its awesome thats it's a Christmas album. I like this song the best off the cd because it has a bit of "We're Not Gonna Make It" in the solo. As a matter of fact this song sounds like "We're Not Gonna Make It" so much in fact I wonder if it was an inspiration when they wrote it.



Track 19: Oggie Boogie's Song- Tiger Army



I used to like Tiger Army, but now a days their sound has gotten a little to pop punky for me. This song as Hot Topic'ie as it is reminds me of old Tiger Army, expecially the solo. I love this movie and I thought the Revisited soundtrack was a great Idea. It has such artists as Marilyn Manson, Devchka, and Feona Apple. You could only get this track off of iTunes for it was never on the cd, even though its possibaly the best cover on there.



Track 20: Swiss Colony Beef Log- Eric Cartman



I close with Swiss Colony Beef Log. Its from the South Park Christmas album "Mr. Hankey's Christmas Clasics". What can I say it rocks. South Park is one of my favorite cartoons and this is a great complementary to the show. Mostly a companion piece for the show it boasts some new songs just for the album, this being one of them. It makes me want Hickory Farms.



Well I hope you enjoyed this, and feel free to tell me some of your Christmas favorites!

Zack

20 Zombie Death Tunes

I figure everyone has made a survival kit just in case of a Zombie Apocalypse. But what most people don't realize is that the zombie doom wont just last a day, and the end of the world may be music-less. Just like some of you will need some music for jogging and you will need some tunes to grind up the undead. So here it is, hit shuffle on your iPod (or zune, its the end of the world use what you got) and listen to 20 Zombie Death Tunes!

20. Adolescents-Word Attack



This makes me wanna run around with an axe shouting "We'll Attack"


19. Extreme Do You Wanna Play!



If this song is good enough for Joan of Arc to lead a mall work out its good enough for me to blast out some Zombie's brains.


18. Andrew W.K. - Party Hard



How sweet would this be, shouting party at zombies while you decapitate them with a samurai sword!


17. Agnostic Front - Victim in pain



Short and sweet, just like my Zombie Killing will be!


16. Dwarves - Back Seat Of My Car



You are running over zombies with this blaring from your modified Hearses sound system. The cattle catcher pushes the infected out of the way for a clean get away.


15. Nekromantix - Rot in Hell



This song gets me goin, I could go at them with a hunting knife, if this song is pumping through my veins.


14. Exhumed - Limb From Limb



Naturally this would be the song to play while using your chainsaw...fun fact I used to sing this song to my old boss after he would get mad at me, no wonder I got fired.


13.SSQ - Tonight (We'll Make Love Until We Die)



She's doing it again!


12.Motorhead-Sacrifice



You need to have Lemmy with you. A world with out Lemmy is a world not worth living in.


11.GWAR-Jack The World



Its already gonna feel like a Gwar show with all the disemboweled people and blood and bile turning your clothes into a grotesque tye dye.


10.Engorged-Return of the Living Dead




I want to be reminded of this movie as much as possible, cause chances are there wont be a working dvd player anywhere.

9.The Vandals "And Now We Dance"



I always imagined this would be great for busting in doors shooting zombies and stealing stuff.

8.Ghoul-What a wonderful world



Seeing as this is probably happening as you are finding shelter in the deserted mall, and I never took music lessons, so I couldn't play it, but it is what I want to hear.


7.RUN-DMC - Mary, Mary



I dont know, for some reason I always pictured this song during a massacre type setting, and when am I gonna get this opportunity again. I know Id be pissed that I didnt put this on the mix.


6.Impaled - Gutless



Of course Im gonna need a song about gutting someone, thats just common sense.


5.8bit Duane-Zombie Killing Blood Spilling



As long as the apocalypse is nothing like Ghosts and Goblins, you are touched twice and you lose your armor and die, what kind of shit is that?


4.Radioactive Chicken Heads - Atom the Amazing Zombie Killer



Hey its my list and I can shamelessly plug my movie if I want to. Its an awesome song anyways.

3.Devo-Uncontrollable Urge



Ive got an urge to kill Zombies! Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeyeyeyeyeah!

2.Sid Vicious-My Way



You've been bit. You know its the end. But before you turn you are gonna take out as many of those fuckers as you can. What a way to go!

1.Iron Maiden - Fear Of The Dark



The hordes surround you, you have a machine gun and grenades. You figure out you plan, and then BAM! You are cutting Zombies in half with automatic rounds. At the end you are standing over a pile of bodies and a smoking gun in your hands.

Well Im stocked up, got my portable charger, headphones and weapons.
Id love to hear what you guys come up with on your lists!

My Favorite Blaxploitation Movies

*Note I never finished writing this one for some reason. Perhaps I will someday*

The Blaxploitation genre is probably one of my favorite genres in film. For those of you not familiar with the genre it came to be in the 70s when the movie studios saw that black people watched movies too. Usually with themes that hit close to home in the African American community such as drugs and crooked cops, it also birthed Black Frankenstein. The studios saw that with a black cast that they could make money. Some pretty awful films were made just to exploit the black movie going audience (and today as well...Im looking at you Norbit), but some great ones were made, movies that captured the spirit of the Civil Rights movement or just a plain fun time.

Now a days Blaxploitation are looked back on almost as bad movies with Undercover Brother or Austin Powers Goldmember being the only frame of reference a lot of people have about these films, and some truly special movies are not given the time of day. So I hope to introduce you to some of my favorite movies.

P.S. Click on the dvd covers for the Amazon.com link to buy them.


5. Sweet Sweetback's Baadasssss Song-1971


"You bled my momma... bled my poppa... but you won't bleed me."

Rated X by an all white jury, the poster boasts. Sweet Sweetback is often credited as being the first Blaxploitation movie, although director, Melvin Van Peebles would disagree. Sweetback is a tale of a man with sexual powers, witnessing a police beatdown of a black man. So he takes the law in his own hands and kills the the officers and is now on the run from the "man". With help from the community Sweetback makes his escape.

Sweetback is played by the director, and also has a great soundtrack by Earth Wind and Fire.





Also check out the biopic, Baadasssss by Melvin Van Peebles son, MarioVan Peebles. Its a good companion piece with Sweetback and usually is a double feature in my house.




4. Boss Nigger-1975


White Man's Town... Black Man's Law!

Boss Nigger is a good ol fashion western shoot 'em up. This movie has a lot of good action and it is also pretty funny.





3. Black Mama White Mama-1972


Nothing Behind But Prison Bars. Nothing Ahead But Trouble.





2. Black Belt Jones-1974




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1. Coffy-1973